


Stars in the Sky

by CielTheStarry



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-18 22:24:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16127984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CielTheStarry/pseuds/CielTheStarry
Summary: Having a soulmate is having a bond where all physical pain and wounds are shared. Everyone has a soulmate, whether they want one or not, and Marinette isn't too sure which side of the fence she's on. Because her soulmate hurts themselves, and in turn, hurts her.In which Chat Noir sees Marinette's wounds and a conversation ensues.





	Stars in the Sky

                Marinette wasn’t sure how she felt about her soulmate.

                She wanted to hate them, to throw a fit and somehow break their bond because of the way they shared pain and injuries, but then the other part of her wanted to take care of them and let them know that hurting themselves wasn’t the answer.

                It started around the time she was 12.

                At first they were just little scratches, enough to make her think she had run into something and not noticed, or scuffed her leg against the desk when she started to get up. But soon after that they turned into ugly red gashes all along the tops of her legs. She understood that you felt the pain of your soulmate so that you could be better connected, but she didn’t understand _why_ hers was doing such a thing as hurting themselves.

                She told her parents, and they were worried, but they just assured Marinette that it was a phase and it would be okay. They doctored her wounds and sent her to bed each time, saying that it would get better soon. And in her parents’ heads, it probably was. She just didn’t let them know that it continued over the years, or even worsened. They probably thought she would never be seen in short shorts to hide the scars, not the wounds that continued to appear.

                But it was too hot tonight to wear anything but to sleep. So she locked her door like she normally did before she went to bed and changed into her one pair of sleep shorts, that just happened to be tiny.  

                It was muggy in her room, and before she went to sleep she wanted a breath of fresh air. So, assuming that no one would be able to spot her from atop her balcony, she went outside, defenseless in regards to her legs. She didn’t like people knowing about it – in fact only her parents knew about it and that made her feel awful enough. So she kept it a secret.

                But the warm air on the wounds felt nice, she decided, as she sprawled out on one of her lounges outside. She closed her eyes and laid back, enjoying the warmth and the small breeze every now and then.

                A few minutes passed, and she heard a thump off to the side. She lazily looked towards it to see if a bird had perched on her balcony as they sometimes do, but had immediately recognized it as something else entirely.

                It was a cat.

                A black cat.

                With blonde hair.

                She scrambled to curl into a ball to hide her legs, but the look on his face said it all. He had seen, and he had thought that she caused them.

                “I don’t like people seeing those.” She said after a minute, looking away from him.

                “I’m sorry.” It was obvious he was speechless and wasn’t able to think of what else to say. He had been around her what, twice, out of costume, and he didn’t know her that well, or so she thought.

                “Hey, Chat Noir, can I ask you a question?” She looked him in the eye and watched as confusion sprinkled his expression.

                “Sure.”

                “Do you ever think about how your soulmate feels things? Like if the pain is really the same?”

                “If you’re talking about when I’m in fights and the like, no. Mine and Ladybug’s soulmates don’t feel our pain when we’re in the suit. It absorbs that energy. It would be too easy for people to discover our identities that way.”

                She knew that of course. “Oh.”

                “If you’re talking about outside the suit… I used to.”

                She could tell it was something he didn’t want to talk about. But it was something she did want to talk about, so maybe he could listen. “Because these started happening around two years ago. I didn’t do them to myself. My soulmate did them to me. Well, to themselves. They just appeared on me.”

                Chat Noir’s face was stricken with horror.

                Marinette giggled a little. “Yeah, that’s the same look my parents had when they saw it, and I explained that they just appeared. But I got used to it. I got used to hiding everything and not letting anyone know. I don’t even think they know that it still happens. But sometimes I wonder if we truly feel the same pain. If it hurts me as much as it does them when it happens, you know? And then sometimes I wonder why our emotional pain doesn’t come through that bond as well.

                At first I hated them, my soulmate. I don’t know who they are, if you were wondering. But I don’t anymore. Not really. I figure if they can’t handle their pain, and they just need to know that someone else shares it, too, that I’ll be there for them. So I deal with it and keep it secret.”

                Chat Noir looked like he was about to cry, and honestly it made Marinette a bit uncomfortable. “How come you only used to think about it?” she said after a tense moment.

                “Because I stopped caring. I got so absorbed in myself I stopped really caring about whether or not my soulmate felt the same pain I did. I just focus on myself now and ignore the small amounts of pain that come from my soulmate. I don’t know mine, either.”

                “…Oh.” She honestly didn’t expect that from Chat Noir. She knew him better as Ladybug than anyone else did, but not even Ladybug knew this side of him. It was something that he was sharing only with Marinette, and part of her felt honored.

                “I guess I should keep it in mind from now on.” He did a laugh like a broken man, then sat down  on the floor in a way that looked like he collapsed.

                “Chat Noir, are you okay?”

                “Honestly, no.”

                “What’s wrong?” Marinette ran over to him and put her hand on his shoulder, and he looked up at her, and the tears had finally started falling. She had to gulp to keep herself from crying, too. She was a really bad sympathy crier.

                “Can I tell you a secret? Something that no one, well one person, knows?”

                “If you trust me, I’ll keep it to myself.”

                “Okay.” He took a deep breath. “I…”

                It took him a few minutes of opening and closing his mouth, but he finally got the words out that he had been trying to say.

                “I hurt myself, Marinette. I’ve been causing my soulmate the same pain that you’ve been going through _for years_ and I just stopped thinking about them. I stopped thinking about how I could be putting them in a situation like you are right now, stopped thinking about how they felt every slice I’ve ever done to myself. I just feel like such a dick.”

                That took the wind out of Marinette, and she half-collapsed beside him.

                “Honestly? You are kind of a dick. But it’s alright, you can still change things. It’s not unfixable. At least if your soulmate is anything like me.”

                “Thanks for being honest.” He was sincere about it, not with the joking tone that he would normally say something like that. But it was enough, enough for Marinette to start crying too.

                “What if my soulmate is as kind as you are, Chat? What if they spend all day trying to make others laugh and be happy, and then go home and hurt themselves? I always imagined they were just a dark and dreary person, but now, I don’t know. How can I live with myself knowing that I almost hated someone who was just trying their best?”

                “You’re the one who just said you could still change things.” He responded, putting his hand on her head.

                “…yeah, I guess.”

                “Bad at taking your own advice?”

                “Terrible at it.”

                “Can we be friends?”

                Marinette looked up at him, and saw the determination on his face. If only he knew that they were already friends, and more than that to boot. “Chat, I don’t know…”

                “Please. I’ll be safe, and I’ll keep you safe. Now that someone knows, I just… I want to stay in touch with you. I don’t want to go home and everything be the same, like this night never happened. I want to know that someone out there believes in me.” He said the last part quietly, looking down at his hands in his lap.

                “All of Paris believes in you, Chat.”

                “Not my ability to save other people. My ability to save myself.”

                Marinette thought for a minute and then sighed. This was probably going to be a terrible idea, but she shook her head clear and made up her mind. “Okay.”

                “That’s a yes?”

                “Yup.” She smiled. “But on one condition!”

                “Anything.”

                “We have to keep this friendship secret. I don’t want everyone trying to flock to me because I know the famous Chat Noir.”

                He giggled, and that made her feel better on the inside. “I can do that.”

                She stood up then, dusted off her legs, and stretched. “I’m getting sleepy, kitty.”

                “Alright princess, I’ll leave you now, then.”

                “Princess?”

                “You called me kitty, I’ll call you princess.”

                “I’ll never call you kitty again.”

                “Well, too bad. Princess has stuck. Bye princess!” He jumped off of her balcony then, using his baton to propel him through the night.

                She hmphed and went back down to her bed, where she curled into a circle and fell asleep quickly. Her dreams had everything to do with black cats and the stars in the sky.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! I'm not sure if I'm going to finish this one or not, but it's an idea that got stuck in my head. I hope you enjoyed it!


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